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Dave Lukas, The Misfit Entrepreneur_Breakthrough Entrepreneurship

The weekly podcast with serial entrepreneur, Dave M. Lukas, devoted to giving you incredibly useful and unique insight from the world's top entrepreneurs with a focus on their non-traditional methods for achieving success, their Misfit side. Misfit was created to give YOU the breakthrough entrepreneurship strategies and actionable advice to accelerate your success! The show's open format and Misfit 3 concept, combined with Dave's intuitive and engaging interview style quickly uncover each guest's key tools, tactics, and tricks that listeners can start using in their lives right now. Learn more about the show at www.misfitentrepreneur.com and become a member of Misfit Nation by signing up for the Misfit Minute, the FREE weekly email with specific resources from the week's "Misfit 3," and actionable tips and items from the world of Misfit Entrepreneurs. It is delivered every Friday to your inbox!
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The weekly podcast with serial entrepreneur, Dave M. Lukas, devoted to giving you incredibly useful and unique insight from the world's top entrepreneurs with a focus on their non-traditional methods for achieving success, their Misfit side. Misfit was created to give YOU the best, actionable advice to accelerate your success!

The show's open format and Misfit 3 concept, combined with Dave's intuitive and engaging interview style quickly uncovers each guest's key tools, tactics, and tricks that listeners can start using in their lives right now.

Learn more about the show at www.misfitentrepreneur.com and become a member of Misfit Nation by signing up for the Misfit Minute, the FREE weekly email with specific resources from the week's "Misfit 3," and actionable tips and items from the world of Misfit Entrepreneurs. It is delivered every Friday to your inbox!

May 22, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Jonathan Mann. I first met Jonathan at the Fireside Entrepreneur Retreat. I was curious as to why I saw this guy walking around everywhere with a ukulele in his hands everywhere he went. And then, one evening, at dinner, I was even more surprised to see him announced and come up on stage.

It turns out, Jonathan is known worldwide as the “Song a Day Man.” He’s been featured on CNN, Time, and a ton of major outlets as well as performed at various TED events, not to mention being hired by companies like Dr. Pepper, Novartis, Gartner, and others to create a unique memory for the events.

Jonathan has a written a new song and posted the video of it every day since January 1st, 2009. That is well over 3000 songs and by the way a Guinness world record.

Talk about Misfit Entrepreneur who created an awesome business by doing something people thought were crazy, I knew as I soon as I saw him on stage that I had to have him on the show the share his experience and what he’s learned on his journey.

www.JonathanMann.net

@Songadaymann on Twitter

Jonathan has known that he wanted be a song-writer since he was 12 when he got his first guitar. He was obsessed. It was all he thought about and did. But, as he says, he “sucked at it for a long time.” He says he has no real natural talent, it just happened because he has stuck with it for so long. He kept writing songs all through high school and college.

He would struggle with writer’s block and finding inspiration. He would always have the urge to create and express himself, but would get blocked because of this. He would have moments where nothing good would come out. In the winter of ’08, he was 25 years old, it was the height of the financial crisis, he was unemployed, and Jonathan got handed a flyer for a thing called “Fun-A-Day,” a global art project where people make a piece of art each day for 30 days in January.

He decided to do a song and video on YouTube every day for January. It went well and he had a fun doing. He decided to do it for a year. Once he accomplished that, it became his life and mission. He is now over 3800 days straight (10 years!) and going and has received the Guinness World Record.

Talk to us about Discipline as it takes a tremendous amount to do what you do…

  • People assume Jonathan has traits like being very well-disciplined or is obsessive-compulsive.
  • As he says, he has no super power in either.
  • What drives Song a Day is the lack of rules around it. Except for one – He will write and produce one new song per day.
  • It’s the simplicity of focus on the goal for each day that makes it possible. There is not specific schedule or system or anything. It can be done at any time, just as long as it done that day.
  • People put too many barriers in the way of accomplishing goals. They make it more complicated than it has to be.
  • Go easy on yourself. Put as few barriers between you and doing the daily task you want to do.
  • Jonathan does have a natural “desire” to keep things going. This is important as Desire is important to any goal that you would want to accomplish. If you don’t truly have the desire to accomplish a goal – it probably isn’t a worthy goal.
  • It is not easy. Jonathan has days that are difficult, but some of these days produce his best work. So, he now knows from experience that even when he doesn’t want to do it, he should and see what comes out.

How has doing this helped you grow as a person? Anything changed?

  • He has grown tremendously as a musician and song-writer.
  • One thing that has improved the most is his voice has gotten better. It is practice. Everyday he gets better and his voice muscles get stronger. This is a lesson that can used for anything.
  • Playing the long-game makes you better over time. Duh!
  • Now, ten years later, he has realized that he has a musical and visual journey of his life which is very humbling. He has been through breakups, death/loss, to getting married, having kids, etc. and it’s all there.

What is an important business lesson you’ve learned from your journey?

  • Jonathan says he’s still trying to figure the business side out.
  • He has learned that he has a good gut instinct for seizing an opportunity and using the skills he has to make the most out of it.
  • He’s learned that he needs to follow his instincts. It is not as precise or planned. But, it is about the curiosity of sniffing things out and seeing them through.
  • Jonathan gives an example of how he landed business by making a song for a person he met…
  • You must always be on the lookout for the those little moments and then use your abilities to get in the door and make things happen. Don’t’ let them pass.

At the 27 minute mark, Jonathan has a unique take on chances and creativity….

It is easy to shoot yourself down before you even start, but if you think of it this way. Each chance you have is precious and if you don’t take it you lose out on that chance. A lesson is that there are always more chances. If you take just one big chance a year, it has a tremendous weight behind it and in your mind huge ramifications. But, if you have 365 chances, they have less weight, but you have more chance to succeed in larger ways than if you miss the one big chance.

  • There are two kinds of creativity: Generative and Editing
    • Generative – Flows best when you are not under pressure. Just let it all come out.

Tell us about the business you’ve built around Song-a-Day?

  • Jonathan will tell you this is the part he is not as good at.
  • The long game has helped because he has been around so long and stayed with it so long, he gets a lot of word of mouth.
  • He is always networking and open at events he does and finds new clients there.
  • Social Media helps as well
  • He has expanded his services for clients. It is easier to sell them more, when they are already buying you. He also now offers personal songs for special occasions as well as explainer videos/songs for clients.
  • There is no magic bullet – he struggles like anyone else with generating consistent leads and he takes advantage of all the opportunities he gets.

How do you find inspiration?

  • Inspiration is BS
  • You cannot sit around waiting for it to strike.
  • That is the secret of not having “writer’s block.” All writer’s block is - is a fear of failure.
  • The trick to not ever having writer’s block is that you cannot wait for inspiration and you must be OK with making something bad.
  • Practice the 70-20-10 rule: 20% of everything you make will be bad anyway, 70% will be mediocre, but 10% will be truly great. If you just accept this, you can start getting to the good stuff.

At the 40 min mark, Jonathan tells us about his latest project, the ISO. Initial Song Offering.

Over 3000 songs, which one is your favorite?

  • No idea. It changes constantly.
  • Every year he releases an album of the songs and refines them (editing) and those are the songs that are his favorites.

Best Quote: “It is easy to shoot yourself down before you even start, but if you think of it this way. Each chance you have is precious and if you don’t take it you lose out on that chance. A lesson is that there are always more chances. If you take just one big chance a year, it has a tremendous weight behind it and in your mind huge ramifications. But, if you have 365 chances, they have less weight, but you have more chance to succeed in larger ways than if you miss the one big chance.”

 

Jonathan's Misfit 3:

  1. Embrace 70-20-10. 20% is going to be bad. 70% is mediocre. 10% is truly great.
  2. Beware making things too precious. Don’t put too much stock in one chance over another. Realize that every chance is an opportunity and take them and see where they lead.
  3. Develop a willingness to be open and follow your nose. You never where an opportunity can turn up.
May 15, 2019

Hello Misfit Nation! Welcome to another edition of "Lessons for Hannah!" In November of 2016, we introduced a new format that we are putting alongside our regular episodes called “Lessons for Hannah.” Hannah is my daughter and one of the main inspirations for the Misfit Entrepreneur. I wanted to have a place where she could go and learn from her daddy and his Misfit friends throughout her life….even after I am gone. If you haven’t listened to the first episode of "Lessons for Hannah," I urge you to as it gives some more background and tells the amazing story of how Hannah came to be in our lives.

"Lessons for Hannah" are short, very useful, and sometimes comical lessons, that I have learned which I want to share with you and give to Hannah to help in your lives. Because I want Hannah to have these for her life, I’m going to speak as though I am talking directly to her. These episodes are a lot of fun and if you think there is a lesson that we should include in these episodes, please don’t hesitate to send it over to us at support@misfitentrepreneur.com. We’d love to share it.

This week’s Lesson for Hannah

I want to talk to you about something very important to your success and well, life in general. The difference between hearing and listening – and what it means to be truly present. In life, we are bombarded by things all day coming from seemingly every direction. Some of these things are important, others are just distractions. And, there has been a lot of study done on how the average person’s attention span is getting shorter and shorter.

If you think about it, it makes sense. As technology has enabled things to be more readily at our fingertips, there is more to interrupt our life and for us to consume. I fear that it will be even worse than it is now when you grow up. And that is why this one skill will be so important. It will make such a difference for the people that have it because it will be increasingly rare to find.

That skill is learning the BIG difference between hearing and listening and committing to be truly present in your interactions with others.

Let’s start with hearing vs. listening. I know there have been times where you are busy doing something and your mother and I are talking to you and you acknowledge that we are, but don’t really pay attention to what we say. I mean, you are 6, going on 7. It’s par for the course. But, it is also prevalent in adults too – I’m guilty of doing this as much as the next person. I admit that I can multi-task with the best of them. I can be on a phone call, answering email, checking stock quotes, posting on social media, etc., all at the same time and you wouldn’t know it if you were on the other end of the line. But, I do!

And I know I am not giving my best in these moments. While, I am not perfect, this is an area I’ve really tried to focus on in recent years and it is incredible how much it pays off. In fact, doing this show has really helped me to hone this skill as I know the more engaged I am and focused on each guest, the better the episode will be. I’ve even put rules in place like keeping my cell phone out of the studio, turning off notifications on the computer, and closing email to make sure distractions don’t come up.

You see, when you are just hearing someone or something, you are not fully engaged – you are not truly listening, or active listening as it is called. To truly hear someone, you must focus on them and think deeply about what they are saying so that you can give your best to them in that moment. You must listen to them, not just with your ears, but your mind as well. That is the difference between hearing and listening.

And when you do this, you will be truly present in that instance and fully engaged which will deliver much more for you and the person you are listening to. A much richer, more meaningful, and more fruitful experience. ​

Hannah, and anyone else who is listening, take the time to learn the difference between hearing and listening and commit to being truly present in your interactions in life. You’ll be glad you did, have great success, and ultimately a richer life.

I love you, Daddy

 

Best Quote: “To be truly present and engaged, you must listen to others, not just with your ears, but your mind as well."

 

Misfit 3:

  1. There is a major difference between listening and hearing. This difference will contribute directly to your success.
  2. Commit to be truly present in your interactions and not just hear with your ears, but your mind as well.
  3. Make it a point to actively listen and remove the temptation to multi-task when dealing with others.
May 8, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Lauren Zander. Lauren is the co-founder and Chairwoman of the Handel Group, an international corporate consulting and private coaching company based in New York City. She is also the author of the best-seller Maybe It’s You: Cut the Crap, Face your Fear, Love Your Life – a no nonsense guide that teaches people to get what they want out of life.

 Lauren has worked with everybody from Fortune 500 Companies like Citibank, Gap and Linked In, to Academy Award Winning Artists, Grammy Winning musicians, and her groundbreaking methodology, The Handel Method, is supported by top educators and psychologists and has been taught in over 35 major universities and institutions of higher learning throughout the country. If that’s not enough she also contributes to the New York Times, Harvard Business Review, Forbes, BBC, and many others.

But, our conversation today may make some of you uncomfortable, because Lauren has a message for you. That message is that you are lying. All of us lying. And she is going to tell us what we need to do about it.

www.HandelGroup.com

Lauren is 49, happily married with 3 kids ranging from 16 to 10. She lives in the country in a 1790’s farmhouse. But, she has been out on her own as an executive/life coach since she was 28. It happened because she could not understand why no one was teaching the truth in education and talking about the truth in humanity – what we actually deal with. People were not focused on emotional intelligence or confronting the dark side of who we are, so she set out to do so.

You state that “everyone is a liar.” Explain that for us…

  • Lying is when there is a thought in your head that you are saying to yourself and what comes out of your mouth is not the thought in your head.
  • We lie from the most basic of hiding what we are thinking to making people happy, or not getting into trouble.
  • There are 7 different types of ways that we lie.
  • We keep secrets that are lies
  • When we lie, it erodes the relationship to your own truth, ourselves and keeps us being true to ourselves in every conversation or interaction.
  • Science shows that the average person lies 11 times per day.
  • It’s everywhere and no one is facing it…

What are the 7 ways we lie?

  1. White lies. These are the most common to where we lie for social norms or to be polite, etc.
  2. Mis-representing information. We misrepresent facts, but don’t exactly lie, or at least justify it to ourselves that way. For example, maybe you read a chapter of a book and it comes up in discussion and you say, “Oh, I loved that book.” When you really didn’t read the whole thing.
  3. Exaggerating. Another form of social norms or attempting to make a story sound better than it was, etc.
  4. Under -exaggerating. Making things that are a bigger deal, seem like they aren’t or purposefully deflating their importance.
  5. With-holding information. This is a big one and is dangerous because they keep us from confronting things or creating larger problems in the future. For example, someone asks you how your day was and you say “Great…” when you actually had a terrible day.
  6. Real secrets. Things you go to the grave with. Typically, there is shame with these and they eat at you causing internal struggle.
  7. Purposeful lying. Knowing lying for personal gain, enrichment, or to avoid trouble.

How do people confront their propensity to lie and how do you manage the lie of being honest and it getting you into trouble?

  • First, you must be aware to the fact that you lie and decide you will change the habit.
  • Go through the 7 ways people lie and ask yourself, “How do I do these in my life?”
  • If you agree that lying is bad for you. Bad for your life, health, relationships, business, etc., you have to understand how you do all those ways of lying so you can recognize them when you start to do them.
  • The big issue is not “Are we doing this in our lives, but do you realize and understand how much better your life be if you stopped.”
  • Lying is not a dirty, bad word – it is born into us. It is an innate human behavior as part of preservation.
  • “Lying for humans is like breathing. We don’t face how we lie. If you don’t know how you lie and all the ways you lie, it means you don’t know your own inner dialogue. This causes us to leave a lot on the table – Self-Awareness, Deeper Intimacy, and a love of being honest that you will never know.”
  • It is never the other person’s fault why you lie.
  • We need to “human” better.
  • There is an art of telling the truth that begins with confronting our internal selves.

Let’s talk about truth in the business world. How do people navigate being honest and balancing that with doing business in their lives?

  • There are ways that you need to learn to talk to different types of people and be tactful, but it doesn’t defend lying or the willingness to lie.
  • First choose which relationships in your life you feel are most important vs. those that are not or are not good.
  • There is a way to be wonderful and tell the truth. It starts with reframing the question or the situation with an individual to make sure you are giving the best, honest answer to their needs. Find out what people really want to know.
  • One of the easiest ways to stop lying is to stop making excuses and apologize. Don’t make things up to make people feel better and put yourself in a position where they are more important because you have to lie for them.
  • You’ll be more respected for telling the truth in a world of liars and the truth is simpler anyway.
  • When you decide to tell the truth, it begins to make you accountable for yourself and your life.

You work with some of top performers in their fields in the world. Are there any traits or consistencies you see across them that help them to succeed at high levels?

  • They have very good family values.
  • They have crazy, big visions
  • Their visions care about making a big impact in the world while making money.
  • They care deeply about being great in the world and for their world and for their family.
  • Many of them are the outliers in their families.
  • Many of them are from poor backgrounds and climbed out.
  • They are brutally smart and are on a missions – many times since they were a child.
  • They are driven, hungry, and don’t quit.
  • They take their health seriously.
  • They strive for best in class.

At the 40 min mark, Lauren tells us about the Handel Method…

It broken into 3 sections

  • Section 1 is how to deal with you mind, excuses and how to chase your dreams.
  • Section 2 is making a list of your parents traits positive and negative and how it lives in you. You then map it onto yourself.
  • Section 3 is dealing with “haunting memories.” You have to confront what is haunting you in your life and understand it.

At the 46 min mark, Lauren talks about her latest concept, “Time Warps”

  • We all think time is constant, so there is a notion that time is like gravity. But that is not true. Y
  • our relationship to time is something that you should “make your bitch.”
  • Time is a verb and interpersonal relationship. ​

Lauren says her method can be summed up in the following 3 movies:

  • Groundhog Day
  • Defending Your Life
  • What the Bleep Do We know Anyway

 

Best Quote: “Lying for humans is like breathing. We don’t face how we lie. If you don’t know how you lie and all the ways you lie, it means you don’t know your own inner dialogue. This causes us to leave a lot on the table – Self-Awareness, Deeper Intimacy, and a love of being honest that we will never know.”

 

Lauren's Misfit 3:

  1. Don’t die with your lies and don’t let your loved ones die with theirs…
  2. Most people sell out on love and don’t do enough work to find true love in their lives. Do the work.
  3. Resolve everything with family. Do not die in disputes. Family is most important in life.
May 1, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Justin Hartzman. Justin’s storied history as a entrepreneur is well known. He is the founder of WeSellYourSite.com, the first online broker for e-commerce websites. He created the first digital skin company for myspace that allowed people to customize their pages. Before all of that, he and one his friends and now longtime business partners created a humor website called RudeJoke.com as teenagers that pulled in $15-20k per month.

Justin is now the CEO of Needls, the first ever Roboagency, a full automated platform that creates, targets, and optimizes digital ads on both Facebook and Instagram. ​

Justin’s done more in business than most people would ever dream of, so I had to have him on to discuss some of his legendary exploits and to get his best wisdom and success secrets to help you in your life and business…

www.Needls.com

jh@needls.com

Go to Needls.com/Misfit for 35% Off

Justin comes from a family of entrepreneurs. At 8 years old, he started working at one of his families retail businesses. He really enjoyed the thrill of making a sale and standing out. In high school, the internet came about and he started to get into it. The possibilities were endless. He first got started online in gaming and then started RudeJoke.com with a few buddies. They were featured in magazines like Maxim and others and were coined the “entertainment site of the year.” And he was only 13-14 years old!

Within a few weeks, they started getting millions of users per day. This started them looking at all the unique ways they could market. They even paid a guy at Yahoo! $75/mo to list them at #1 in their categories. He started making 10’s of thousands of dollars.

He then went off to college and when he came out, he realized that his family business of real estate and development wasn’t for him, so he got back online. He knew the founder of MySpace, but the guy didn’t like him and disallowed him from being on the site. Justin kept asking and pestering him until he was allowed back on. When he went to MySpace, he saw pages that had no content, so they had the idea to become the guys to create the content for pages and started the business. They found a hack with Yahoo! That paid them $10+ a click. Within 3 weeks, they were getting a million users a day. 3 months later, Justin sold the business. They then took that money and bought their competitors who weren’t using their Yahoo!, but using Google and only getting about a $1 a click. They put their Yahoo! strategy on it for 9 mos, made their money back plus more and then sold that business.

In selling 2 businesses in 9 mos, they saw a gap in the market to sell internet businesses. They then decided to become the first internet broker. They created www.WeSellYourSite.com which became the #1 brokerage site for boutique deals. They then sold that business.

Now, they have started Needls to help make marketing on Facebook and Instagram for efficient and profitable.

After all that you’ve done, what has surprised you most about entrepreneurship and what have you learned from it?

  • It is not easy. For every high, there is 10-20 lows.
  • You have to push your limits all the time.
  • The more you put in and the more useful you are to others, the more it comes back to you.
  • You constantly have to be learning and growing in business and as an individual.

Any low points?

  • Justin has been smart about putting money away and managing the success – this is critical.
  • If you lose your humility and think things will always be good, you are very mistaken.
  • You have to be prepared for the next storm and make sure that you have yourself in position to weather it.
  • Justin has shut companies down and lost investor money which is very tough.

How important is timing and how do you look at a business from a timing standing to know when to jump in?

  • If you have to educate a market, you have to get in early, and have a lot of resources to last while the market comes together.
  • “If you build it, they will come” does not exist anymore – it costs a lot to get a client.
  • Before you do anything, sell the product. Don’t worry about it being perfect. See if people will pay for it.
  • Find something that people have a desperate need for…something they have to have because they can’t get something else without it.

At the 22 min mark, Justin takes us through journey of Needls and how they went from $0-$2 million in your first year…

  • In Needls case, the market for Facebook advertising is crucial
  • People are failing to do it themselves.
  • Traditional agencies are very costly.
  • Facebook is different than search like Google. People talk about things they do – not go searching.
  • What Needls does is create your ads in 6 questions and looks for conversations over social media and then put the ad in front of them when they are needing something.
  • It is all done in an automated fashion.

What should we know about the current state of Facebook and Instagram advertising?

  • Advertising isn’t a magic bullet.
  • It takes time on any platform.
  • Lower budgets take longer time.
  • More important than anything is not how you advertise or get leads, but how you handle them on the other side.
  • You must have the full package to be able to deliver and close the sale when the opportunity comes.
  • You have to have a good message.
  • You have to be mobile friendly.
  • You should make that you capture information from the individuals that come your way, so you can keep in contact with them.

Does Facebook and Instagram work well for certain types of business? What type of businesses work well in this environment?

  • Business to business can work, but is a little more expensive to do right.
  • Who this type of advertising doesn’t work for are people who have a crappy product and a crappy website.
  • You have to have the whole package.
  • The minimum ad spend should be at least $50/week, but where they see the most success and the average of their users spending about $1000/mo.

Talk to us about being the Accelerator with Needls. What are some of the things you learned there that can help entrepreneurs?

  • No matter how successful you are, there are always things you don’t know.
  • They can teach you how to build a culture.
  • They can teach how to structure and properly use a board.
  • You have to be strategic about going with accelerators.
  • Do your research and know the value you will get for what you may give up.
  • Needls went with Generator for their accelerator. It is mid-west based.

Secrets to creating solid, long-lasting business partners?

  • Knowing yourself through tests like DISC or others is very important.
  • Your partners should have different strengths than you and be different personalities.
  • It is like a marriage and needs to be balanced out.
  • The hard times make you stronger.
  • It will be hard, there will be bad days, and you will not always get along.
  • Business partners are partners in life as much as they are in business.

What lessons have you learned about exiting a business?

  • Be prepared. It doesn’t just happen
  • Make sure you have your corporate governance in good shape.
  • Your accounting must be solid.
  • Make sure to clear out your skeletons in your closet or be transparent about them.
  • Get your Cap table in good shape as well.
  • Time kills all deals. Don’t wait too long.
  • Deals only happen when everyone is a little unhappy.

Where do you see the most opportunity for entrepreneurs in the next 3-5 years?

Cannabis is a big trend.

Block chain and Crypto.

Software as a platform that is vertically integrated so you don’t need multiple platforms.

Automation software.

 

Best Quote: “Time kills all deals. Deals only happen when everyone is a little unhappy.”

 

Justin's Misfit 3:

  1. Be useful. The more useful you are to others, the more that will come back to you.
  2. Take the step on the other side of fear.
  3. Always be open to learning and growing yourself.
Apr 24, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is John Assaraf. John probably needs no introduction as one of the world’s leading mindset experts and authors on human performance, but if you haven’t heard of him, here’s a little bit about him.

John is a serial entrepreneur, brain researcher, and the CEO of NeuroGym. In the last 25 years, he has grown 5 multi-million-dollar companies in real estate, internet software, brain research, life and business coaching - and consulting. He is the author of two New York Times best-selling books: “Having It All” and “The Answer.”

And he has a brand-new book called “Innercise: The New Science to Unlock Your Brain’s Hidden Power” which I couldn’t put down because it covers a subject so near and dear to me – becoming aware and learning to control your thought patterns. To truly choose your mindset and have it work for you to deliver the results that you deserve. So, I’m very excited for our discussion in this episode.

www.IgniteMyBrain.com

www.JohnAssaraf.com

www.MyNeuroGym.com

Facebook Fan Page – Achieve Even More

John took his life’s “mess” and turned it into his message. His parents were divorced, and he moved from Israel to Montreal when he was 5. He had trouble because he didn’t know English or French, only Hebrew. For the first 3 years of school, he was so far behind that the teachers thought he had a learning disability. He ended leaving school after 11th grade and went to work in the shipping department of a computer company where he was miserable.

He felt there needed to be something more. His brother set up a meeting for him with a successful entrepreneur in May of 1980. The man asked him what his goals for his life were and John’s response was basically just to be able to pay for basic needs. The man challenged him in that he was capable of so much more. John didn’t have any bigger goals. After lunch, the man gave him a set of goal setting documents to him. John watched the show Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous and decided to go for it. When they met again, he told John it was awesome and “way to dream.”

Then he asked a very unique questioned. He asked, “Are you interested in these goals or are you committed? John asked what the difference was and the mentor told him, “If you are interested you’ll do what is convenient. You’ll allow your past, stories, and current beliefs to drive your behavior. You’ll come up with excuses and reasons why you can’t. If you are committed, you upgrade your stories, your skills, your habits to become the person who can achieve these goals. Once you’re committed things start to happen.”

At 19 years, the man, Alan Brown, committed to mentor John in real estate and help him to get on the path he took to get where he is today.

What else did you learn from Alan and along the way through your career?

  • One lesson is the importance of planning. Not just having a goal but planning and the specific behaviors needed to get the goal.
  • Next was understanding the mindset and mental game needed to overcome the challenges and how to use the power of your brain in addition to behavior.
  • If you have an inaccurate map of reality and behaviors, you will not get the results you want.
  • You must be truthful with yourself to make progress.
  • You must take responsibility for your results or lack of results.
  • Your self- esteem and self-worth are critical to your success
  • You must be aware, responsible, and that you can change your results by changing the way you think and behave.

At the 17 min mark, John answers the question, “How does the brain work when it comes to our conditioning and automatic responses?”

  • Our brain is not an organ, it’s an organism. Every day it is creating new patterns of thinking and believing. It is living and changing all the time.
  • As the brain learned and is influenced by sources in our lives (parents, friends, school, family, etc.), it begins to make connections and associate them with other things. And the brain creates meanings to give things.
  • As we grow, we go into the next phase outside of imprinting from sources in our younger days. At this point the patterns begin to cause our actions in our lives.
  • It is in this stage that the brain begins to choose reactions in which it shies away from fear and then energy conservation second. So anything that the brain perceives is harmful or will consume a lot of energy – it will push us away from.
  • The next factor is whether our outside and inside worlds match. If the outside world doesn’t match what you feel you deserve, your brain will sabotage you until they come into alignment at the internal level. A good example of this is the average lottery winner going broke within 5 years.
  • You have to become who you want to be on the inside before it can happen on the outside.
  • When we are in conflict between the conscious brain which is what we want and the subconscious brain which is what we have been conditioned to expect, then there is neural chaos or dissonance.

We have to learn how to create harmony between our goals, our vision, and our desires and our subconscious patterns. We can do both at the same time.

Most people have to goal and the dream, but they don’t do anything to focus on the subconscious patterns. There are actually only 5 things that get into people’s way of doing this. Innercise leads to this.

  • Innercise came from the fact that our brain is a muscle that can be exercised.
  • The brain is moldable and plyable. You can create and design new patterns.
  • As such there are techniques to work the brain and practice building your core neuro-muscles.
  • You can upgrade your beliefs, habits, and perspectives to new levels.
  • The brain is the most powerful tool in the known universe.

Neuroplasticity is a result of clinical work that realized our brain is consistently making new connections. When you see something new, your brain creates a new connection of that thing. It takes mental pictures of what the senses felt in that experience. These connections become the automatic self that acts without us having to think. If you repeat something enough it becomes an automatic response and habit of our brain. But, you can change it – even though the brain doesn’t like change.

What are the Innercise exercises for how to change our thinking?

  • Ignitemybrain.com
  • Innercise #1 - Take 6 Deep Breaths to Calm the Circuits. Take 6 breaths focused with your breath coming out of your mouth like blowing through a straw. This deactivates the fear or stress response center in the brain. If you do this every hour, you actually reset the brain to get everything in sync.
  • Innercise #2 – AIA. Awareness. Intention, Action. Awareness is what gives us choice and choice gives us freedom. When you take time become aware of your thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc. and then ask “what is my intention” for the next (30 mins, hour, etc.) and get that intention. You can then ask, “What is the most important action I need to do to fulfill that intention.”
  • Focus on who you want to become and then what beliefs are needed to reinforce it, you have created the basis for moving to your next level.

“Most people are living in a reactive state instead of a deliberate, responsive state because they haven’t learned how to truly tap into the power of their mind…”

What is the one thing people can do right now, today, to start taking control of their thoughts?

  • Emotions drive your behavior. Start recognizing your emotions such as fear and other disempowering emotions.
  • In recognizing them, you can be aware to them and start to decide how you want to respond them – instead of automatically reacting to them.
  • This is a habit that can and should be developed by everyone.

What is your best advice for an entrepreneur starting our today?

  • It’s really hard…
  • We already know how to grow a business. We know all the how, but what most entrepreneurs fail to understand is that there is a huge difference between having an idea/product/service that you love and growing a business.
  • Growing a business is a skill that must be learned.
  • You will need to figure out which role you should be playing and fit best, then fill the other roles. You can be the owner of the team and still play one of the roles.

“Most entrepreneurs don’t fail because they run out of money. They fail because they run out of hope. They don’t understand the complexities of the game and don’t seek the help needed to play the game at the highest level.”

What is the biggest lesson that business has taught you about life?

  • Business is a great game to play with ups/downs/highs/lows.
  • If you give up for the wrong reasons, you are selling yourself short.
  • The battle scars in business create and help shape your character.
  • You don’t have to know it all yourself – seek and let other people help you. Asking for help is a strength.

Why do we always feel like we have so much more potential, but in many cases don’t reach it?

Human “being” is just as important as spiritual “being.” There will always be a part of us that yearns and wants for more. That is absolutely OK.. But, if you want more, are you willing to become more?

 

Best Quote: "Are you interested or are you committed?"

 

John's Misfit 3:

  1. You can retrain your brain to achieve higher levels of results and performance in every area of your life.
  2. Having a vision, goals, and plan is scientifically proven to get your brain to actually take the actions required to achieve your goals.
  3. Lift as you climb. Help each other achieve the goals you have and you will reach them faster.
Apr 17, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Scott Keyes. Scott’s just your every day, run of the mill guy who turned a hobby of finding cheap plane tickets into a multi-million dollar business in less than 2 years. As he would say it, Scott’s Cheap Flights was more an accidental business and he started out as more of an accidental entrepreneur. A misfit if you will.

Over the last 5 years, the business has grown to service hundreds of thousands around the world, help save clients millions of dollars on their flight purchases, and has been featured everywhere from CNBC to Virgin, Conde Naste, and Time Magazine.

Scott has learned a lot about finding a niche and cultivating a great business from it and that is one of the things I’m most excited to explore with him in this episode.

www.ScottsCheapFlights.com

As Scott says, he’s an accidental entrepreneur. He ended up where he is completely by accident. The way it came about happened after he graduated college and moved to DC. He had a degree in political science and loved to write. He became a political journalist. There wasn’t much money in it, but Scott wanted to travel and needed to find a way to fund it. So, he got into the world of travel hacking.

He got really good at it over the course of a couple of years. It all culminated when in 2013, he got the best deal he had ever gotten – a ticket from New York to Milan for just over $100.

When he got back from his trip, word had spread amongst some of his friends and co-workers and they started asking him to share deals with them when he found them.

He started an email list to send out deals he found to his friends and co-workers. Over the next year, he did as a hobby, but the subscribers started telling other subscribers and they told others and so on.

By 2015, it had grown to over 5000 subscribers. At this point, there started to be some costs involved. In August 2015, Scott relaunched as a “freemium service” in which there is still a free signup, but also a paid sign up with more content and perks.

Nowadays, Scott’s Cheap Flights has over 1.5 million subscribers.

When you look back on how you got to this point, what is your best advice on how to discover a profitable niche and uncover opportunities under your nose?

  • Don’t quit your day job overnight. Whatever you start, do it part time and split time.
  • Build things on a small budget – don’t spend a bunch of money up front.
  • Test things out for a little while before going all in on a strategy or offering.
  • You must find something that brings real value and that people will actually pay for (and not just support you)
  • If people are willing to pay for something, they value it and others will too.
  • The main thing is to use micro-thinking. Try different ideas over smaller periods to see what is getting traction. But, be ruthless in cutting out the things that don’t show promise.

At the 16 min mark, Scott tells us how SCF works…

  • They are not a travel agency.
  • What Scott and his teams do is spend every moment of the day searching for cheap flights.
  • Really good deals pop up and don’t last long. Sometimes they are only available for 4-5 hours.
  • They then alert subscribers, so they can get them before they disappear.
  • Scott uses an example of roundtrip flights to New Zealand for under $400.
  • As Scott says, what SCF is, is an early detection system to find the diamonds in the rough.

At the 19 min mark, Scott talks about how the business is setup and the model (this is a great model that you could follow in your niche).

  • There is a free subscription in which subscribers get access to 1 out of every 3 deals by “region” that SCF finds.
  • For a few dollars month, Premium subscribers get access to all deals and can select by “airport” so they can be more specific to their needs.
  • Lastly, Premium subscribers get their emails first and free get them 30 mins later.

Scott loves the freemium model. In today’s age, people are skeptical. It is so much better to give them a way to show them the value you can create and how you generate results for them. It relieves pressure and creates more devoted clients.

What have you learned about building a business in going from 1 man with a hobby to having employees throughout the world and serving millions?

  • Learning never ends!
  • There is a point in the growth of a company, around 8-10 employees where what you do shifts from the core product of the company to leading people and working to get the best out of them.
  • There is a transition that happens and has to happen as a leader and your skill set will have to change to a focus on people and strategy.
  • Another challenge, especially with remote employees is finding ways to connect them and build a strong team culture. As a leader with remote employees, you must have a special focus there.

Are there any systems or specific strategies you’ve used for remote employees that work really well?

  • SCF grew at a pace of “one employee at a time” and they didn’t take the time so much to build out the systems to communicate well across a larger group which caused some challenges.
  • People in the company didn’t know what was happening in the company.
  • Its’ more important to over-communicate….
  • They found that putting in a system of having regular meetings, communicating through Slack, doing check-ins with team members throughout each quarter, getting feedback, and being genuinely interested in how they can make their team’s lives better.

What have you learned about building and cultivating a subscriber list and how did you transition from free to paid?

  • Scott was terrified taking people from free to paid. He had seen the backlash that customers had when things like newspapers stared charging for online access, etc.
  • The psychology of it is interesting. It seems to be much harder to get someone to pay $1 for something they used to get for free than it is to get someone to pay $2 for something they used to pay $1 for. Even though, it is still $1 more, people don’t see it the same. The shift seems monumental.
  • Being conscious of this is really important and why the freemium model is a good way to go. It removes the barriers to entry.
  • As he moved from free to paid, he gave all subscribers the premium subscription for the first month and gave them the choice of keeping it for free or getting a scaled down version with less features.
  • This also helped created FOMO – fear of missing out
  • He set an extremely low price point, a few dollars a month.
  • It was not so much about profit in the beginning, but to see if people are willing to pull out their wallets.

At the 36 min mark, we have a great discussion on value and what that means to clients.

What are some tips on cultivating and taking care of subscribers on your list?

  • Be very respectful of people’s inboxes.
  • Invest in customer support and be very responsive – create a tribe of evangelists for you. Imagine what people will think if you are responded in minutes to clients, not days.
  • Don’t buy lists to email to – this is huge mistake that can get you blacklisted
  • Your subscribers are your best referral channel – more than paid search or advertising. Treat them well and they will treat you well.
  • There are no short cuts, things have to happen organically

At the 43 min mark, Scott answers the question, “What are some tips on how to find deeply discounted flight deals?”

  • There is a secret sauce which is searching for flights 20 hours a day.
  • First, you want to cross the ocean as cheap as you can, then worry about getting to your final destination. For example, book Chicago to Athens when going to Santorini and then get a cheap flight from Athens to Santorini
  • Change the way you look at flight shopping…invert it
  • Most start by picking where they want to go, then what dates they want to go, and lastly, they look at the prices.
  • Look at price first to see where there are cheap flights right now. You can do it on Google Alerts, Kayak Explore, and a number of places.
  • It is much easier to find good deal this way. Find the price and build the trip around that.
  • If you find a really good fare, it won’t last long. You have to be able to make a decision quickly.
  • A little trick is the 24 hour rule. When you book a flight directly with an airline, you can cancel the flight within 24 hours without issue or penalty. So, you can lock in a price for 24 hours and give yourself time to decide.

 

Best Quote: We are terrible predictors of our own career path. Be open and humble about where your career path can and will go.

 

Scott's Misfit 3:

  1. We are terrible predictors of our own career path. Be open and humble about where your career path can and will go.
  2. Beware of golden handcuffs. You don’t have to stay in a job forever.
  3. Go to conveyer belt sushi places for the price, but order from the menu for the fresh stuff. It’s the same price.
Apr 10, 2019

Hello Misfit Nation! Welcome to another edition of "Lessons for Hannah!"

In November of 2016, we introduced a new format that we are putting alongside our regular episodes called “Lessons for Hannah.” Hannah is my daughter and one of the main inspirations for the Misfit Entrepreneur. I wanted to have a place where she could go and learn from her daddy and his Misfit friends throughout her life….even after I am gone. If you haven’t listened to the first episode of "Lessons for Hannah," I urge you to as it gives some more background and tells the amazing story of how Hannah came to be in our lives.

"Lessons for Hannah" are short, very useful, and sometimes comical lessons, that I have learned which I want to share with you and give to Hannah to help in your lives. Because I want Hannah to have these for her life, I’m going to speak as though I am talking directly to her. These episodes are a lot of fun and if you think there is a lesson that we should include in these episodes, please don’t hesitate to send it over to us at support@misfitentrepreneur.com. We’d love to share it.

This week’s Lesson for Hannah

There is something in this world that has existed from the beginning of man-kind and it has the power to change the world. It has the power to take people and lift them from poverty to riches. It has the power to help people on a world-wide scale. It has the power to make life better, easier, and more enjoyable. It has the power to create whole new ways of thinking or entire industries.

And what’s more, it is also very small. In many ways, it is very simple. And even better, is that it is infinitely abundant, it never runs out.

Sound too good to be true? It’s not. What I am talking about is an idea.

Victor Hugo once said, “All the forces in the world are not so powerful as an idea whose time has come.” He’s right. Ideas change the world. A simple idea of creating a place where the individual was given the freedom and right to life, liberty, and to pursue their happiness created the United States. A simple idea that man could fly, propelled the Wright Brothers to find a way to make it a reality. Almost everything you see around and use today came from an idea. The internet, smart phones, cars, heck even a toaster, started as a simple idea in someone’s mind.

Everything begins with an idea. Ideas are the most powerful things in the world. And they can be created and used for tremendous good and extraordinary evil. Nazism started as an idea, was turned and weaponized into a movement and ultimately killed millions of people in its wake. Same with the ideas of Stalin, Mao, Polpot and others. Over 100 million people were killed because of their ideas.

I use these examples to illustrate the power of ideas and to make you aware of the fact that this power can be abused.

But, a great example of an idea taking hold and standing for thousands of years is that of Christianity. I recently watched a movie about the life of the Apostle Paul that was fascinating and such a great illustration of an idea that can do so much good. Paul was first known by another name, Saul of Tarsus. He was a persecutor of Christians. He hated them because they did no follow the traditional doctrine of the time. And one day, Paul was blinded during his travels and Jesus appeared to him. Shortly, after per the prediction of Jesus, a man came and healed Saul. He became a believer and became known as the apostle Paul. He went on to be arguably the most influential person in the Bible next to Jesus. He traveled well over 10,000 miles on foot setting up churches and preaching and sharing the story of Jesus and the faith of Christianity. Even after being imprisoned and sentenced to death by the emperor Nero in Rome, he continued to write letters from prison and teach. Many of these letters make up what is the New Testament today. In fact, half of the books in the New Testament are attributed to Paul. He truly did amazing things and never wavered from his principles or core beliefs.

So, why am I sharing this with you? It’s simple, what could compel a man to devote his entire life to teaching and spreading the word of something? An idea. And for those listening, whether you are Christian or not, the example of Paul is a great one to see what the power of what an idea can do and drive a person or group of people to become. You can apply the example to your religion or belief set.

Understanding this, as you look throughout history, you can see why ideas are the most powerful things in the world. Why did Mother Teresa do what she did? A powerful idea that she believed in. How did we get to the moon in less than 10 years? An idea. An idea that we could do what everyone said was impossible.

Hannah, every day in your life, you will have ideas. Learn to recognize them, understand them, and use the good ones to help you create your life and leave an impact on the world. How do you know a good one, you might ask? My best answer is to trust your gut. If it aligns with your principles and values, has the ability not just to help you, but others, is worthy of being shared with others, and most importantly, is something you believe deeply in, then it is probably a good one. The key is to act on it.

And no matter what, not all ideas will work out, but that is the beauty of it – ideas are infinite, there will always be more. So, enjoy the ride and make the most out of the ideas you create and the ones that are shared with you that resonate with you in your life.

Here’s to the power of an idea!

I love you,

Daddy

 

Best Quote: “All the forces in the world are not so powerful as an idea whose time has come."

 

Misfit 3:

  1. Everything begins with an idea.
  2. Ideas are the most powerful thing in the world.
  3. Ideas can be used for tremendous good or extraordinary evil. Make sure you are using them for extraordinary good.
Apr 3, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Phillip Andrew. Phillip is an Emmy-nominated producer, world traveled DJ, speaker, and coach out of LA whose has been featured everywhere from CBS to Netflix, E, Country Music Television, and tons of other places.

But, it is not his successful producing career that made me want to have him on the show. Instead, it was his story of loss, overcoming addiction, and how he lifted himself to new heights that really resonated with me.

He now speaks throughout the world about how to develop resilience, stand in life with integrity, and how live life to its fullest. And in this episode, I’ve asked to share his best advice and life lessons with you.

www.PhillipAndrew.co

phillipandrewla@gmail.com

Phillip is originally from Detroit. His dad was a police chief. His mom was very involved with the school board. Everyone knew his family and as a result, Phillip felt entitled and had a big ego. It also developed anxiety in him in needing to be the perfect kid. As he says, this was self-inflicted. His parents never pressured him. He was also the youngest kid on the block and hung out with the older kids and was trying to impress them to fit in.

He started developing masks for the person he needed to be with different audiences. When he was 11 years old and hanging with the big boys, he started drinking and partying. It ended up being an escape for him from his masks. One day they were sitting at the dinner table having a normal dinner when he dad grew silent and turned the TV off. He then proceeded to tell Phillip and his sister that their mom had cancer. Phillip was 14. They all cried.

Phillip put on a “tough mask,” and endured, but just before his 16th birthday, his mother passed away. This combined with his drinking was the perfect recipe for keeping the alcohol in his life and letting it gain more control – even though he was high functioning and still doing well in sports, school, etc.

From 18-20, it really came to a head. He was arrested multiple times, crashed his car. Got a DUI and had to go to AA.

AA was a place where he finally found a level of acceptance, he didn’t have to prove himself or try to please people. He’s now been sober for over 10 years.

At the 15 min mark, Phillip talks about how freeing it was to finally just be himself and who he really is.

“Secrets grow in the dark and will hold you hostage”

When you learn to choose how you live and take the power back from others and note cede it to them – you find the ultimate freedom. True freedom lies in taking control and ownership of who you are.

At the 18 min mark, Phillip talks about how grateful he is for the problems he had and why – and how even small experiences in our lives can have such a big impact.

Define resilience…

  • Resistance is something that comes along and wants to shut everything down.
  • Resilience is knowing your mission and saying “No matter what, I will get through this”
  • But, we are not meant to “just get through life.” We are meant to thrive in it.
  • Resilience helps up to thrive and take ownership and learn from the things that happen in our lives to get better and serve ourselves and our purpose.

“If you want to be more resilient, accept that fact that failure, struggle, and hardship is coming. It is a part of life. Accept it now.”

  • Make the decisions of how you will handle situations ahead of time, before they come up – not when you are in them.
  • How can you show up in the most powerful way?

How do you teach people to attain or regain self-confidence?

  • Start at gratitude.
  • What are you grateful for?
  • What are the things that you are complaining about in your life that you can be grateful for?
  • We are very good at “finding problems,” but not so good at “finding solutions.”
  • Shift the mindset from “I wish” to accept what is and be grateful for it and the opportunities that come with it.
  • Find areas in your life where you can serve somebody.
  • Build systems such as affirmations lists, mission statements, daily routines, daily gratitude time, etc.
  • We don’t have an information problem, we have an action problem – and application problem. You have to act on things to make a difference for yourself.
  • We cannot get so afraid of making the “wrong move” that we don’t make any move at all.

What has being a producer and a world-traveled DJ taught you about business?

  • Both of those roles are in people industries which most things are.
  • Understanding and being able to work, motivate, and interact with people are critical skills to succeed.
  • It teaches you to put who you are becoming ahead of the task at hand.
  • It also teaches you to do the work to get what you want. You cannot avoid it or get around it. It has to be done and it has to be done well.
  • Show up powerfully and be consistent and persistent.
  • Following up is so critical. You may have to do it 10x or more to finally get an answer or get acknowledged.
  • Develop a mindset of always going forward. Always. Accept it.

What does it take to put on a great show? What elements do you need?

  • You must have a great message. A great story. Story-telling is key.
  • And different shows serve different purposes. You must know the purpose and align things correctly.
  • You also need to have an idea of what the end-game is.
  • If you are going to write a book, write the reviews you want first. Write the call to action ahead of time. Then write the book to lead to it.
  • With TV, starting at the end and what you want the audience to feel and know, is the most important step.
  • You also have to understand the things you can control and make sure they are done to the best of your ability and empower others to do the things they need to do at the best of their ability.

 

Best Quote: “If you want to be more resilient, accept that fact that failure, struggle, and hardship is coming. It is a part of life. Accept it now.”

 

Phillip's Misfit 3:

  1. Ask yourself if you are being people pleasing or service oriented in each situation. Serve people.
  2. What would your family, business, team, group, etc. look like if everyone were giving the same amount of care and effort that you were giving? Hold yourself accountable to be the example for them.
  3. There is freedom in vulnerability. Get rid of the secrets, be open, and honest with yourself.
Mar 27, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Dr. Diane Hamilton. Diane is the creator of the Curiosity Code Index (CCI) assessment and the author of Cracking the Curiosity Code.

She is a nationally syndicated radio host, speaker, moderator, consultant, and educator. Her radio show Dr. Diane Hamilton Radio showcases successful individuals including C-Suite Executives, Time Magazine’s Most Influential People of the World, Forbes 30 Under 30 Inductees, Nobel Peace Prize Nominees, New York Times and Wall Street Journal Best-Selling Authors, and other successful individuals who share their stories and insights. Through her work as the MBA Program Chair at the Forbes School of Business and at several other universities, she has taught more than 1000 business courses. She has a Ph.D. in Business Management and is a certified Myers-Briggs MBTI and Emotional Intelligence EQ-i instructor. If that is not enough, she is highly sought after speaker, speaking to groups to improve employee relationships, increase engagement, improve productivity, and reduce conflict.

One of the most important, and least understood skill sets for entrepreneurs, leaders, and well, anyone is emotional intelligence and we could not have a better person on the show to talk to about it on the show.

www.CuriosityCode.com

www.DrDianeHamilton.com

Diane started in sales doing a number of roles from pharmaceuticals to real estate. After a few decades, she wanted to get into teaching. She thought thousands of courses and this led to her being the MBA program chair at the Forbes School of Business. Through this, she got to work with and learn from some of the top business minds in the world like Steve Forbes. This got her interested in interviewing and started her down the path she is on now.

What is emotional intelligence and why is it so important to develop in our lives?

  • It is understanding your own emotions and those in others and then reacting appropriately in your behavior.
  • It’s extremely important because your behavior and soft skills are some of the important things that impact your success and career.

Is this something that comes naturally to people or something that has to be developed?

  • It is something you must work on
  • Influences in your life impact your emotional intelligence
  • Your environment has a large impact as well
  • If you were around people with high EI throughout your life, chances are that your EI will be higher than someone who did not have that environment.
  • No matter what, it is something you can continue to improve.

One of the best resources on Emotional Intelligence is work by Daniel Goleman

At the 11:30 mark, Diane talks about Curiosity and how it relates to your EQ?

  • Curiosity is a big part of improving EQ and succeeding.
  • In fact, there are 4 factors that influence curiosity which relate directly EI:
    • Fear
    • Assumptions
    • Technology
    • Environment

Steps to improve EI/EQ?

  • The most important step is to become aware
  • Get a foundational baseline measurement of where you are by taking one of the many assessments online.
  • Get input from others that will be honest with you and be open to it.
  • Be present in the moment when communicating
  • Be careful to develop your empathy which will improve your EQ/EI

What is the difference between emotional intelligence and critical thinking?

  • EI is about understanding your emotions and how they impact how you are feeling.
  • Critical thinking is about looking at a bunch of different content/data and process it to make a good decision.
  • A lot of people don’t know how to make decisions by putting everything together and getting to the best decision.
  • You have to learn to separate emotion from logic very well to master both of these concepts

How do people avoid analysis/paralysis and become more decisive in this area?

  • Beware of planning too much because of data overload.
  • A lot of leads try to take on too much by themselves where they need to get help, outsource, or delegate.
  • Learn what you are truly good at and focus there – find the resources to handle the rest.
  • Look for the simple, unconventional method.
  • Try using a simple checklist.

At the 27 min mark, Diane answers the question, “Why is curiosity so important and what were some of the big things you learned about it while researching and writing the Curiosity Code?”

  • There are so many things that come back to curiosity – it all seems to revolve around it.
  • Inspiration, motivation, drive, growth, etc. all happen because of curiosity.
  • The big “aha” was that there is no research on how to improve your level of curiosity.
  • There is no system or training for it. We must move from “Are you curious or not?” to “How utilize it to grow and succeed at higher levels?”
  • For some reason, we lose our thirst for curiosity as we grow and we need to learn how to get it back.

Define curiosity…

  • It can be confused with drive or motivation but is so much more.
  • It is the spark. The strong desire to know more.
  • What is important is to look at the factors that impact it – that is how you can grow your curiosity.
  • Curiosity is figuring out how to overcome challenges instead of shying from them.

At the 38 min mark, Diane takes us through each of the 4 factors and what we should know about them…It’s best to just listen to this segment

  • Fear
  • Assumptions
  • Technology
  • Environment

How do people take these 4 factors and use them to gain more results in their lives?

  • Once you recognize that under each factor, there are specific areas to work on
  • Diane has created a quiz that will help you understand each area and show you where you need to go.
  • www.CuriosityCode.com (Assessment)
  • Once you know where you are in the areas, you can go to work on them and start to make changes.
  • In the end, as with anything, it takes ACTION!

What are 1-2 things you see consistent across the high performers that you interview and spend time with?

  • They are curious
  • They are tenacious
  • They read a lot
  • They take calculated risks and have a good ability to handle risk
  • They know they don’t know everything, but they focus on what they do need to know and bring together the rest

 

Best Quote: “Companies hire for your hard skills and fire for your soft skills, so you must work on your soft skills – your Emotional Intelligence and Critical Thinking."

 

Diane's Misfit 3:

  1. Companies hire for your hard skills and fire for your soft skills, so you must work on your soft skills – your Emotional Intelligence and Critical Thinking.
  2. Learn something new. You must develop curiosity use it to your advantage.
  3. If you don’t have goals to drive toward, you are missing out on what you are capable of accomplishing.
Mar 20, 2019

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Nick Santonastasso. Nick is a medical miracle. Not only is he one of four people alive with the rare genetic condition, Hanhart Syndrome, but the inspirational keynote speaker is also an internationally known bodybuilder and fitness model – despite missing both his legs and one arm since birth.

Nick has been featured everywhere from Forbes to the Today Show, FOX, TLC, BBC, Inside Edition, and MTV. He got his start on Vine making prankster videos and I have to say, they are hilarious, especially the zombie pranks. As owner of Raw Mettle Enterprises, Nick is a speaker, coach, consultant, and author of the new book Victim to Victor, How to Overcome the Victim Mentality to Live the Life You Love.

The Rock said this about Nick, “think about this for a second, Nick was born with one arm and no legs. In his mind, there’s nothing he can’t do and he’s right. He’s right because he does everything he sets his mind to. Life deals us cards on a daily basis, but we always get to decide how we’re gonna play them. Thanks Nick for helping me frame my perspective on life just a little bit more.”

Now, it’s time for Nick to help you frame yours a little bit more…

www.BookNickSanto.com

@NickSantonastasso on Social

Nick was born with Hanhart syndrome, a super rare syndrome that either leaves a baby born with undeveloped limbs or organs. Nick was the 12th person ever born with this syndrome and 8 of the other passed away due to undeveloped organs. Nick was given a 30% chance to live but made it as his organs were 100% healthy.

From there he was just a kid like any other until he got to middle school and high school where he began to be noticed as different. Middle and High school were his low points. He hated his body, he questioned why he was born the way he was. Nick sought out support and joined wrestling – but to do so, he had to voluntarily amputate 5 inches of his one limb to be able to move in the ways he needed to. He wrestled his junior and senior year which lead him into having fun doing skits on Vine. That lead him to body building and then into motivation and keynote speaking and even fitness modeling.

With all that you’ve done, what is the most important thing you’ve learned that you feel others must know?

  • Life is all perspective. Your mindset is your biggest superpower.
  • The way you think, your mind, is the one thing that can allow you to do everything or hold you back from everything.

How do people train themselves to control their mind and ways of thinking?

  • Our mind is basically a computer and it is programmed through our environment.
  • The key is to identify the bad habits – admit to them and then start instilling good habits.
  • Then repetition is needed to make the change to the new habit stick and become normal.
  • Working on yourself takes a while – it is a process can only be done through time.

How do we maintain perspective?

  • Sit and think about a moment in the past that you felt was negative.
  • Pull out one good piece of information from that event – a lesson, a thought, etc.
  • There is always something good…
  • The habit part is to develop a mantra that every time something negative happens to us to ask, “What’s the good in this?” Find the good.
  • Focusing on the negative doesn’t serve us.
  • There is a way to gain in everything.
  • Nelson Mandela, “You don’t lose. You learn, or you win.”

At the 14 min mark, Nick talks about his book “From Victim to Victor” and we start a big discussion on the victim mentality.

Nick favorite story from the book and lesson?

  • The story of how no one wanted to sit next to him on a plane.
  • The lesson is the meaning you attach to things. We dictate how we look at things, respond to them, and how much we let them affect us, etc.
  • When faced with a tough circumstance, challenge, or negative situation – Ask yourself, “What’s it going to be? What meaning will I choose to give to this?”

Thought on Leadership?

  • Great leaders are people persons
  • Everything you do has a lasting effect
  • You have to connect with people and help them and guide them to all rowing the boat in the same direction
  • People know when they are getting BS’d. Don’t BS people.
  • If you don’t genuinely care for people – it is hard to be a leader.

Tell us your thoughts on victimhood and those playing the role of the victim and what you think the answer is…

  • Parents are having a difficult time raising kids in today’s world.
  • We seem to be missing some core beliefs being instilled in our lives such as gratitude.
  • The solution to Victim mentality is not only instilling a core set of beliefs but also confidence.
  • When people feel better about themselves and gain confidence, they move out of victimhood.
  • The way you build confidence is to set “micro-goals.”
    • For example: You make the goal wake up 30 mins earlier so that you can workout for 30 mins, etc. and you do it. Very quickly after doing it, you will feel better, accomplished.
  • When you do this, you build that relationship with yourself, so you know who you are, you create and know your self-integrity. You know when you commit to something, you will get it done.
  • Confidence is having a relationship that is so good with yourself that it doesn’t matter what the outside world thinks of you or does to you.
  • The biggest limiting beliefs come in the from of not having confidence in yourself.
  • If you are in a slump, do one thing, big or little, that you know will make you into a better person and you will begin to build momentum.

Nicks biggest realization:

You have one life. The chances you are alive are so small. Get moving and make everything you can out of that life.

“Regardless of whatever hand that life has dealt us, it is our duty to play that hand to the best of our ability.”

At the 38 min mark, Nick talks about how to annihilate excuses…the flips the stables on me.

Best pieces of advice on entrepreneurship?

  • Things are always going to go wrong.
  • If you are going to blame someone for the bad, you have to recognize and acknowledge them for the good as well.
  • Do your best to work with people that honor and share your core values and have alignment.

 

Best Quote: “Regardless of whatever hand that life has dealt us, it is our duty to play that hand to the best of our ability.”

 

Nick's Misfit 3:

  1. Live in a state of gratitude and implement it into your life. Starting your day off with gratitude is starting your day off on the right foot – and I don’t have a right foot, so if I can do it, you can do it too!
  2. Perspective is the meaning you attach to things. Ask, “What good is there in this?”
  3. You have to be your biggest cheerleader. Change your language and change your life. Use only empowering words for yourself.
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