This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Sharon Grossman. Sharon Grossman is a psychologist, success coach, and keynote speaker who’s an expert in Emotional Intelligence. She’s also the author of the best-selling book, the 7E Solution to Burnout and hosts the podcast, Decode Your Burnout.

She’s helped hundreds of high performing entrepreneurs learn to be more product and avoid or even recover from burnout. Through her simple and effective methodology she teaches how to have a competitive advantage that wins in business, minimizes stress, and helps you experience life on your terms because winning is non-negotiable.

Burnout and taking on too much affects most entrepreneurs at some point in their journey and I’ve been looking for an expert to come on and help us in learning to recognize it, better manage it, and if possible avoid while still making it happen for our businesses – so I was excited to get Sharon on.

www.DrSharonGrossman.com

Sharon is a clinically trained psychologist who practiced therapy for 20 years. She noticed a common theme with clients being highly stressed and started to do more research on burnout which is chronic stress. She listened to her clients with a different ear recognizing burnout. And in sharing this with them, it would create “aha moments” helping them to understand their challenges.

When we understand what we are experienced in life, it helps to diagnose it to help us solve challenges in front of us.

At the 6 min mark, Sharon tells a story about when she was grad student and hearing a speaker talking about solo practitioners burning out in the field. When she go into her own business, she remembered the talk and vowed not to be a statistic, so she set up her business around the life she wanted to have.

“You have to think about what you need in order to sustain yourself.” It is about mindset and believing it is important enough to make it happen when it comes to stopping burnout.

How does someone psychologically break out of their bad habits and “comfort” with the state of burnout that they live in?

• James Clear said, “We build habits to solve the repeated problems we have in life. And what do you think the odds are that the solutions we come up with are the optimal ones?” It’s unlikely.
• We get into patterns and so much of what we do in the world is on auto-pilot from our subconscious, but it comes back to our fundamental believes.
• These believes are shaped by our early life experiences and influences.
• If you find yourself in a loop or stuck, you really have to get under the hod, understanding what you believe and making meaningful changes to it to help yourself.
• You then have to start showing up and aligning with the identity you want to have. Even if it is just a little bit a day.
• You must state who you are. If you want to exercise more – you need to state that “I am a person who exercises for 30 mins daily.” And let’s say you have a day where you don’t want to do or you don’t have 30 mins – you still do 10 mins if that is all you have because “you are someone who exercises daily.”
• When you keep showing up day after day, you are reinforcing the identity.

At the 15 min market, Sharon and I have a discussion on our conditioning and subconscious.

• A lot of people like clarity and don’t know what they want.
• Many don’t know who they are.
• It starts with defining who you want to be and building the identity and habits that support that.

What should we know about burnout? What are the signs? 

• Burnout is chronic stress.
• The main thing is mental and emotional exhaustion.
• It is distinct from depression. When you are burned out, if you take time away from the source burning you out – you won’t be exhausted anymore. This versus being depressed is that when depressed, the change doesn’t make the difference.
• People who experience burnout not only feel it at work, but at home. It can compound between running a business, family, household, etc.
• Initially, you will notice exhaustion and less motivation. Productivity can then go down and then this can affect your confidence. It can be a snowball effect. 
• If it goes on long enough, the body can start to break down as well.
• You must listen to the signs when your body is talking to you.

3 Different Burnout Profiles. What are they? (Sharon give great detail, so it is good to listen)

• Burnout shows up for different reasons.
• The first type is the thinker. These are people who are very much in their heads and tend to overthink things. Their brain tends to worry.
• The second type are the feelers. These are people that tend to be people pleasers, have a hard time setting boundaries and even experience guilt because their underlying belief is that they need to serve other people and it is selfish to focus on themselves. They give away too much and then become resentful that they aren’t getting enough back in return.
• The third type are the do’ers. The type A, workaholic, super over-achievers. They don’t have much time for themselves and are very driven with a strong work ethic. They overload themselves both at work and at home.
• People can be more than one of these, or even all 3 in some instances.

Once we realize which of the types we are, what do we do about it?

• Once you understand your type, create customized solutions to help you.
• As an example, Thinkers might need to focus on letting go of the need to control and the fear of failure. They also need to increase their self-compassion and trust their instincts to make decisions.
• Self-compassion is where we are kind to ourselves instead of beating ourselves up. It is treating ourselves better…like we treat others.
• For all types, it is good to level set and ground themselves.
• Feelers have to be careful to create more boundaries and learn to shift their believe about their own importance. Additionally, learning to managing their emotions
• Do’ers equate their value with their productivity. They will work until they physically can’t because of burnout. They need to slow down, take time off, and tuning into themselves to understand when they are going too far.

In the end, you must change what you believe to truly make meaningful changes to help yourself. You wrote the 7-E Solution to Burnout. What are the 7 E’s?

• Emotional Intelligence. This is the most important one. You must take one step back and learn to manage your mind. There is a link between your thoughts and emotions.
• Empowerment. This is about your personal power and controlling your energy drains. It is becoming aware on what you need to empower yourself.
• Engagement. Engagement goes down when we are burned out. This can also create brain fog and less productivity. You get dis-engaged. People can also be burned out due to boredom and not being challenged.
• Self-Efficacy. Your belief in your ability to do your work. It’s how you respond the results you get. When you get results you want, it boosts self-efficacy, but if we get over-confident or don’t get the results we want or expect, it can build up and cause issue.
• Energy. Learning to recharge and removing the stress. Getting the mental obstacles to self-care out of the way. We know what to do and need to action doing it.
• Effort. This is about working smarter not harder and making the most of your efforts.
• Enlightenment. Lightening your load by looking at your mindset, getting our of your own way, and using practices to help you center your mind to be your best.

Best Quote: You must change what you believe to truly make meaningful changes to help yourself.

Misfit 3:

1. For thinkers. Trust yourself. Our minds can derail us.
2. For feelers. Self-care is not selfish. You must take care of yourself to be your best for those you want to serve.
3. Emotional intelligence is the #1 skill people must focus if they have negativity in their mind, stress, and burnout. Learn to navigate your thoughts and build better habits.

Show Sponsors:

Benchmark Email (Free account): www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Benchmark

5 Minute Journal: www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Journal

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Jay Haleem Washington. Jay went from working for $8.00 an hour at the Hampton Inn to earning 6 figures as a Commercial Photographer in just a few years. He was able to accomplish all this while being a convicted felon. While working for $8.00 an hour he developed his mantra #IWon’tStarve, which was the catalyst for him to leave his job after only one year. he has become pardoned, and now is a best-selling author 4 times over and motivational speaker.

Over his career, he’s been able to work with the following international brands, Nike, Save The Children Foundation, NFL, Amtrak, and The WNBA. He focuses on strategic development of public sector business, management and administration of client contracts, and client protection via compliance oversight, resulting in growth through government contracting.

But, it’s not so much what Jay does that was the reason I asked him to come on the show as much as it was his message of “I won’t Starve” and how he persisted through to success.

www.Iwontstarve.com

​ www.JHaleem.com

Jay says it was a long journey. He was raised in a crazy home in New Jersey with people on drugs, etc. He was raised by his grandmother and was on the streets early on in life. He got into a lot of trouble but was also a great student. He was smart but using it for the wrong things. He graduated with honors from college, but also committed a white-collar crime that was felony trying to make money in college. After graduating, he was unable to get a job because of his record, so entrepreneurship was the answer.

He started a successful cleaning business and did well, but during the 2008 recession, his wife lost her job on Capitol Hill, and he sold the business moving back down south to focus on raising their kids. He took an $8 job to have something, but new he could do much better and less than a year later started his commercial photography business. An in a short time the business climbed into 6-figures and then grew tremendously as he got into doing government contract work. He then started helping other minority businesses get approved for contracts and has now helped/consulted for over 600 helping them get contracts. He then went on to write his books, start speaking, etc.

What are some of the success principles you’ve learned to succeed in business?

• Early on, it is all about heart and having the guts to do what needs to be done.
• You must personally develop. You can learn to do anything, and you must constantly learn.
• You must learn about the different types of people and how to work with them. You have to take your skill set and match it with others to create a beautiful picture.
• Perseverance. Building a business requires flexibility, endurance, and going through the challenges, learning curve, and progression of building a business.

Talk to us about being persistent and what you learned about keeping going to succeed…

• Jay has seen a lot of people quit and decided it would not be him.
• Knowing he had good skillsets that no one could take away from him, that he could learn, and he was willing to hustle and do what was needed to succeed kept him going.
• Having children gave him the why he needed to continue driving forward.
• He also had seen what happened to people when they gave up and did not want that.

Tell us about I Won’t Starve. What does it mean?

• It came about from spending a lot of time being judged.
• Having to pay back 6-figures for his felony and the other costs made him have to hustle and find a way.
• When he made the decision to leave the $8/hr job, he basically said, “Screw it. I won’t starve.”
• He embodied and started preaching it to anyone who would listen and it resonated.
• “The platform you leap from is more important that the platform you land on.”
• If you build the right platform, you won’t starve!

You have a workshop called UWon’t Starve based on 5 principles, take us through them…

• #1: Hustle while you work. Strive to constantly learn from all those around and look for what you can use to help you succeed. Develop your skills. This works well if you are building a business on the side while working a job.
• #2: Market research. People jump into businesses all the time without understanding the market and how to succeed in it. Who needs your service? Where are they? How often are they buying? And so on. Take the time to have a decent understanding of the market before you leap. Start where you are, but be smart about it.
• #3: Be the one selling the cheese. This is metaphor. If you go to a wine festival, you will see some people like white wine and buy that, others buy only read, but both customers like to have cheese with their wine. Be the one selling the cheese, because then you get both customers instead of just one. Is your solution, the cheese?
• #4 and #5: Use strategic partnerships and JV’s to grow. Partnerships are a great way to grow because you can create scenarios where 1 + 1 = 3. You both can benefit in a larger way that just on your own.

Talk to us more about how to create great partnerships…

• We have to watch our egos are they can stop us from creating great partnerships.
• We can only get so far on our own.
• What does your business do that can complement other business’s needs? What are you willing to do that other businesses are not? How can you help others become more successful?
• The more you help others get what they want, you will find you will get what you want and more.
• Partnerships are a business strategy and should be treated and planned for as such.

What are some of the most consistent challenges you see entrepreneurs have and how do you help them overcome them?

• In the government contract space, it is paperwork and time. There is a lot of hoops to jump through and they don’t move fast.
• You have to find your way into their system and once you get in, you are in good shape. But, you have to break through that barrier to get your first contract.
• It is networking and getting in front of the right people.
• Additionally, you need to build the right systems and teams in your business, so you can focus on the bigger picture and work on the business – not in it.
• Businesses are like a baby. At some point most people have to get a babysitter or day care of their baby so they can go to work. That is what it is like when you build systems and a team – they are the babysitter for your business, so you can truly go to work on it.

Any other advice from your journey?

• Partner and teaming is the name of the game.
• Entrepreneurship is tough, so find others going through the same type of journey and network with them. Help each other.
• If it makes to have a partner in your business, do it.

Best Quote: The platform you leap from is more important that the platform you land on...

Jay's Misfit 3:

1. You don’t have as much time as you think, so go hard early going after what you want.
2. Find people that will support you whole-heartedly. People with support systems go so much further in life than those that don’t. Get your Amen Corner!
3. Be unapologetically authentic. It hurts being someone else. Be you.

Show Sponsors:

Benchmark Email (Free account): www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Benchmark

5 Minute Journal: www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Journal

This week’s Misfit Entrepreneur is Jess Stewart. Jess was raised by a marine corps pilot on a cattle ranch where she learned the keys to running an entrepreneurial company; grit, hard work, and no complaining. Using her experience, years later, she grew up to create a massive medical billing company from her kitchen table that grew internationally. She sold the company for a 20x multiple allowing her to secure her financial freedom.

She now devotes her time to sharing what she’s learned with other entrepreneur and coaching companies to success. She was recently highlighted in Kevin Harrington’s book, Cracking the Rich Code.

I’ve asked her on to share how with no experience she built her company and to share how others can follow her footsteps as well her biggest lessons learned during her journey.

www.Jess-Stewart.com

Jess was raised on a cattle ranch and left when she was 18 to play Volleyball in college. She graduated and became a schoolteacher. But when she moved to a new town with her husband, she found there were no open teaching positions. So, she decided to start a business – a medical billing company out of her house. She didn’t know anything about medical billing, but she was good at solving problems, so she went to work learning. She grew for the first few years in her house, then opened her first office and things took off over the next 10 years growing nationally, then internationally until she sold the business.

At the 5 min minute mark, Jess explains why she chose to go into the medical billing space.

• Jess wanted to find a way to work from home and be with her family.
• She started the company with a few friends that were already going down the path. Ironically, 6 months in her partners could no longer continue and she was left to build it by herself.

What are some of the best lessons you learned growing up on a cattle ranch that helped you succeed as an entrepreneur?

• She had great parents and a great childhood.
• From the time she could walk, she worked on the ranch and was expected to pull her weight.
• The first lesson was grit. It’s not about how many times you fall, it’s about how you get back up and keep going.
• If were going to do the job it had to be done right. If it was not done right, it had to be redone until it was right.
• “Don’t just get it done, get it done right.”

Take us through the journey of how you took your business from your kitchen table to international and ultimately a 20x exit.

• It came down to differentiation. Medical billing is a red ocean. Fierce competition.
• She realized early on that there was more to offer the client because of the industry being antiquated. There was a lot of opportunity for technology.
• She decided that her company would offer a total solution instead of parts of the solution.
• The niche was to offer and host the full practice management solution. (Cloud didn’t exist at the time).
• She pioneered getting medical offices off of doing things on paper to using practice management software and doing things electronically.
• She borrowed $75k from her parents to buy servers and build the network to work point to point with medical offices.
• In doing this, she was able to offer a solution that no one else was doing and be a first to market.

At the 16 min mark, Jess talks about how she got to a point where she was tapped out and how to build a team and what she went through to do so.

• She learned a great lesson in that even though great talent may be making more elsewhere, they may not have what they want. This is how she got her first and most important employee. He left a job pay 3x more than she could offer because he was looking to build something and find true meaning in his work.
• As an entrepreneur, learn to ask for what you want and who you want on your team, then find/figure out a way to make it happen – because it can!
• Jess also shares how she created an advisory and got the help she needed to develop as a leader.

At the 28 min mark, Jess talks about how being ahead of the times put them in perfect position to be the solution when government mandates to go electronic came along.

• Jess shares how the growth was a blessing and a challenge, because things broke down and they had to figure out how to keep up and build their processes and systems to accommodate client needs and growth.
• She shares how she saw a new niche to help in and flew to Nashville to knock on hospital doors. She thought they would be excited about it, but was told no by every company, but one and they were skeptical.
• She left Nashville with no takers and later she got a call from the “one” who gave them a shot in a rural hospital. Jess did it basically for free and proved to be such a success, that she overwhelmed them.
• That company was the one that eventually came knocking on the door to buy her business at 22x! ​

At the 40 min mark, Jess and I discuss what it takes for entrepreneurs to endure and make things happen and how Jess how to deal with burnout and find an operating system for the business.

Best Quote: Don’t just get it done, get it done right.

Jess's Misfit 3:

Walk your own path and enjoy the journey.

Don’t hesitate. Follow your gut.

Never stop seeking mastery in education. Stay humble.

Show Sponsors:

Benchmark Email (Free account): www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Benchmark

5 Minute Journal: www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Journal

​

Hello Misfit Nation! Welcome to another edition of "Lessons for Hannah!" Many years ago, I introduced a new format that alongside our regular episodes called “Lessons for Hannah.” Hannah is my daughter and one of the main inspirations for the Misfit Entrepreneur. I wanted to have a place where she could go and learn from her daddy and his Misfit friends throughout her life….even after I am gone. If you haven’t listened to the first episode of "Lessons for Hannah," I urge you to as it gives some more background and tells the amazing story of how Hannah came to be in our lives.

Lessons for Hannah are short, very useful, and sometimes comical lessons, that I want to share with you and give to Hannah to help in your lives. Because I want Hannah to have these for her life, I’m going to speak as though I am talking directly to her. These episodes are a lot of fun and if you think there is a lesson that we should include in these episodes, please don’t hesitate to send it over to us at support@misfitentrepreneur.com. We’d love to share it.

This week’s Lesson for Hannah

Hannah,

It’s fitting that I start out the New Year with a Lessons for Hannah episode. It truly is amazing how fast time flies. You’ll be turning 11 years old in 2023 and heading off the 5th grade in the fall. It has been incredible to watch you grow and become the amazing daughter that you are. In this episode, I wanted to give you some of what I call “Dadisms.” These are little nuggets of life wisdom that I hope you remember and put to work for you throughout your life. You’ve heard me say some of these many, many times and hopefully they have stuck with you.

In this episode, I want to share 11 of my favorite “Dadisms” with you. Here they are.

1. How you do anything is how you do everything. ​

This one has become more and more important to me as I have aged. Your habits and ways of doing things affect all areas of your life. When you don’t give your best effort in one area, it affects other areas. And many times when you do something at a level that isn’t your best, you end up having to do it again or multiple times. I am not talking about pride with this as much as I talking about the discipline to do things well in all aspects of your life. In committing to do so, you will find yourself playing at a higher level.

2. The most important time to do something is when you don’t want to do it.

This one goes with the last in that the times when we are most at risk for sacrifice doing our best, are those times when we don’t want to something. Maybe we are tired, worn out, emotionally drained, etc. We know we need to do something but find an excuse not to or put it off. These are the times we need to push though and do it. A great example since we are at the beginning of the year, is when someone wants to lose weight. They get all excited and for a short time, maybe a couple weeks, they go to the gym. But anyone who has worked out for a while knows, that after the first few weeks in January, many of those new people at the gym are no longer there. Why? Because when they didn’t see results after just a couple weeks, they got discouraged, and even though they knew they needed to keep at it to see real results, they found excuses not to keep going and nothing changes for them. You see, for those people, the most important time to keep going is when they hit that first wall after a few weeks. If they can push through that and keep at it, they will more than likely stick with it and see real results and also build the habit that sticks.

3. The best things require great effort and time to achieve because they are meaningful.

This one builds on the last two. The things really worth doing and that have meaning in life take great effort and time to achieve. For example, building a habit of taking care of your health and regular exercise. All the work you did for several years to get your blackbelt was worth it and you now have skills you will use the rest of your life.

4. No dead raccoons. ​

And while we are talking about doing things right and taking the time, etc. I will remind of you of my no dead raccoons story. The moral of the story is that when you see something that needs done, don’t wait, do it and take care of it. Otherwise, it could end up messy for you.

5. What you focus on expands in your life and what you believe becomes your reality.

This is one of my favorites because it is wisdom that has literally been passed down throughout human history even from the bible where it states “What you gaze upon you become.” It is very simple what you put your time into will become dominant in your life and what you believe about yourself and your reality will be just that. If you are negative about yourself and think only bad things happen to you, guess what will happen – bad things because that is what you are focused on and what you believe. Conversely if believe you can overcome adversity and are focused on doing great, meaningful things, guess what will happen? You will find and achieve them. (Car example)

6. God, family, country in that order.

This one is straight forward. Your chances of being alive at 1 in 4 trillion, praise God for this gift daily. Your family will always be there for you through everything, treat them with respect, love, and never take them for granted. And lastly, country. You are fortunate to live in the greatest country in the history of the world because it was the first to put freedom ahead of power. Learn it’s history and understand the fundamental principles that created it and embody them as you go through life.

7. Cherish every day. This life is a gift and goes by fast. Give thanks every day when you wake up.

We never know when we will be gone. Life is a blink of an eye in the grand scheme of things. Every day is a gift to cherish and make the most of. Don’t waste your days.

8. Choose your friends carefully. You will have many friends in your life, but only few real ones.

This is important because friends can have a great impact on your life. You will have many friends at different times in your life, but only a few will truly last and only a few will truly be there for you and you for them through the ups and downs of life. Choose them carefully.

9. Be careful not to prejudge others.

Along with choosing your friends carefully, also be careful not to prejudge others. I’ve learned this the hard way in life in that when I was younger I used to make a judgement about someone without really knowing them. Many times, I was proven wrong and finally got the message. Seek to know and understand others before forming an opinion on them. Keep an open mind.

10. Speak the truth and don’t be afraid.

In today’s world, speaking the truth is harder than it used to be. People are scorned, mocked, even physically threatened for speaking and sticking to the truth. And there is only one truth when it comes to things – not your truth or someone else’s. The truth is an absolute, so it is important to be sure you can back it up with evidence when you state it. If you can do that, then do not be afraid to speak it and stand by it.

11. Choose right over easy.

In today’s world where people to have everything instantly, it is hard not to take the easy way on many things. But taking the easy way does not mean it is the right way. Choose to do things the right way. This probably goes with the first Dadism of how you do anything is how you do everything, but it is a choice to do things right. Every day we go through a series of choices in our lives, do your best to chose wisely and choose right over easy.

Hannah, you know I could probably put a hundred of these in this episode and in future episodes I will give more, but it’s best not to eat the elephant all at once, but one bite at a time (ha, there’s another one). I hope you can learn from these and use them in your life to have them help guide you.

I love you,

Dad

Best Quote: I hope you can learn from these "Dadisms" and use them in your life to have them help guide you.

Misfit 3:

Use the "Dadisms" to help you in your life.

Do your best to learn from those around you and gain wisdom, instead of learning the "hard way."

Remember, you have a 1 in 4 Trillion chance of being alive. Cherish this gift every day.

Show Sponsors:

5 Minute Journal:  www.MisfitEntrepreneur.com/Journal